Apartment Life Pt. 1

This year is the first time my friend and I have ever lived in an apartment. After three years of living in the dorms, I initially thought it was be a tough adjustment.

Nope.

But I have found out that it is an entirely different experience from the protected spaces of the University Public Housing.

***

"Dude, where's our lamp?"

The guys before us must have been party animals because they managed to break the glass out of the coffee table, which was only a frame when we moved in. The lamp promised in our lease was also missing. Something tells me it met the same fate as the table. The drawer in the refrigerator was missing and the microwave wouldn't nuke anything for longer than a minute.

Those things were not such a big deal. The scary part was the front door lock would not lock from the outside and the previous tenants still had the keys to the apartment even though they were now residing in another apartment in the same complex. This was made worse by, not the fact that I'm partially paranoid, but that because of band rehearsal, I could not obsessively squat in my new abode to annihilate anyone who dared to enter. In other words, the place was left unlocked for about 6 hours.

"Discovering New Forms of Life in the Bathroom"

One could derive what kind of diet the previous tenants had by what was scrubbed off the inside, under rim of the toilet bowl.

"Odd Finds"

There was a condom in the closet. . . .still intact and in the wrapper, and a package of hot chocolate mix in the cupboard. Sounds like a romantic evening to me. We have yet to find any scented candles they may have left behind.

"The Couch Smells Like . . . Man."

 I'm surprised that men still make fun of women and their perfumes while they are hosing themselves down with mists of masculinity. While the couch is super comfy, taking a quick whiff of the pillows reminds me every time that someone else resided on this couch too.

And that is just the tip of the iceberg.

To Be Continued. . . . . . .